A Better Man
by Loveedith
Summary: Edith and Bertie, spending some time in London, a couple of weeks before their fairy-tale wedding.
1. Dancing Mouth to Mouth

It was in the middle of December 1925.

Almost all of Lady Edith Crawley's problems had been solved, or were soon going to be solved. In a little more than two weeks she was marrying Bertie Pelham, the most adorable man on earth.

Marigold, Edith's secret daughter, whom Bertie knew all about by now, was not only totally accepted but also very much loved, not only by Bertie himself but also by his stern mother.

They were all of them going to have a wonderful life in the beautiful Brancaster castle. The place where she had first met Bertie.

Whenever she felt like it Edith could still go to London and take part in the running of her magazine. The rest of the time it was expertly handled by the friendly and competent Laura Edmonds.

Even Edith's sister, Mary, had been a little bit friendlier lately. It wasn't any longer impossible to be in the same room as Mary without annoying her.

...

There was only one thing that could be a little better in her life, Edith thought. She wanted to become Bertie's mistress before she became his wife.

Not to try him out - there was no one like Bertie, and if sleeping with him wasn't perfect the first time she was sure it was going to get better - there was no way she was going to break with him because of that or anything else.

She loved him so much. She knew he was perfect for her.

No, she wanted to make love to him to show him how much she loved him. She wanted to show him that she loved him just as much as she had loved Michael Gregson.

Or rather - that she loved Bertie so very much more than she had ever loved any other man before him.

She wanted to give herself completely to him. She wanted to give herself to him as a free woman, not as a dutiful wife.

That was part of it. She also longed to feel him inside her and after that lie in bed totally naked beside him. She longed to lie there beside a totally naked him, after they had been making love to each other. She wanted to fall asleep naked, pressed against his naked body with his naked arms around her. With only a duvet on top of them to keep the cold of the bedroom away.

She wanted them to have that as a secret together on the day of their wedding. A secret between just the two of them.

...

Edith was going to meet Bertie after work today in London and then they would go dining and dancing. After that they would have a nightcap and some cuddling and kissing and talking in her apartment.

Then Bertie would leave, as he always did, to sleep in Hexham house. He had slept there whenever he was in London, even before he owned it himself. In the morning he would catch the train and go back to Brancaster. He had squeezed in this visit to London just to see her, coming today and leaving tomorrow, although he had a lot to do at Brancaster before going away on their honey moon.

This was the last time they would see each other in London before their wedding. Bertie and his mother were going to spend Christmas at Downton Abbey to let the two families get to know each other a little better. Edith doubted very much that she would have a chance to make love to Bertie then. There were so many other things happening during Christmas.

Bertie wasn't likely to sneak through the corridors of Downton Abbey late at night, all the way from the bachelor wing to Edith's bedroom. Especially not if he risked meeting his mother in the corridors. His mother who already knew that Edith wasn't a virgin.

No, tonight was Edith's only possible night.

Tonight was the night they were going to be united. Tonight was the night when they were going to be together as husband and wife, without being it.

Tonight he was going to be hers.

...

Later that evening, when Edith pressed her body against Bertie's during their dance, she could feel his arousal.

It wasn't the first time she had felt that, though usually she would pretend that she hadn't noticed. The first time she had felt it was actually when they were dancing at the Café de Paris that day when she had shown him her flat and he had kissed her for the very first time. She hadn't felt it during the kiss - he wasn't holding her close enough or maybe it didn't affect him so much - but during a dance later that night. He had backed away immediately then, looking a little embarrassed, probably afraid that he had offended her. He had been careful not to dance quite as close during the rest of the night.

None of them had said anything about it afterwards.

This time Bertie didn't back away. He kept dancing, holding her just as close, although he must have been aware that she could feel him. So she decided to be bold. She looked up into his eyes pleadingly.

"Please kiss me!" she whispered. "Kiss me and keep dancing like this!"

His lips were on hers almost immediately as they kept dancing. She softly made him open his mouth and put her tongue into it, meeting his.

They kept dancing like that, not cheek to cheek but mouth to mouth. Edith was holding on to Bertie, feeling suddenly weak. Her legs and knees were trembling, she wasn't dancing any longer, he was carrying her.

Their mouths were still together when the music stopped after the dance. Then they broke the kiss.

"Let's go home!" Edith said, without daring to look at Bertie. "I don't want to dance any more."

...

When they had got their coats and left the building he gave her a new, deep kiss. Edith was beginning to wonder whose idea this was. Perhaps - as usual - they had got the same idea at the same time.

They were walking the short distance to Edith's flat in total silence. Bertie held his arm around Edith's waist, kissing her from time to time almost without slowing down. He only slowed down to take his hat off the first time he kissed her, after that he kept his hat in his hand for the duration of their walk.

They both felt that they had passed some kind of limit now. They both knew something was bound to happen between them during that night.

* * *

AN: Well, I wanted to write something M for Edith and Bertie, since there are no M stories for them at all. But since it is me, who haven't ever written anything M before, I think it will still be fairly innocent.

...

Thank you for reading! Please leave a comment!


	2. I Want This to Happen Now

So what happened when Bertie and Edith reached Edith's flat after that brisk walk in the middle of December 1925?

Did they start undressing each other as soon as the door was closed behind them? Did Bertie rip Edith's dress to shreds in his eagerness to get it off? Did they fill the floor with a trail of abandoned clothes from the door till the bed until they had nothing more to take off?

Well, if that is what you thought happened, I'm sorry that I will have to disappoint you.

...

If Bertie really had ripped Edith's dress to pieces, Edith would probably have slapped him on his face, opened the door, told him to go away for good and thrown her expensive engagement ring after him, suggesting that he should stuff it up somewhere dark...

However unladylike that would have been.

She wanted a _man._ A _good_ man. A gentleman, not a rapist.

No, that didn't happen of course. Bertie wasn't the kind of man to intentionally destroy clothes, especially not somebody else's.

He also knew that tenderness was a much better way to win a woman's affection than force. And that it was so much more in his nature to be tender than to be forceful.

Especially with Edith.

...

Once the two of them had closed the door behind them, they suddenly felt a little shy of each other again. The first thing Edith did after Bertie had taken off both their coats and hung them on the hanger in the hall wasn't to start tugging at the rest of his clothes but to ask him if he wanted something to drink.

The flat was rather warm. Edith had turned up the heating before she left, since she had planned for them to be naked there that night. Now she had the satisfaction of seeing him take his jacket off and hang it up beside his coat.

She remembered him taking his jacket off late that night at the office, and then rolling up his shirtsleeves. She remembered how attractive she had suddenly felt that he was. She had hardly been able to take her eyes off his hands and arms, thinking about what he could use them for on her body.

Bertie didn't roll up his sleeves now, but that was only good. It would make it easier to take his shirt off completely later on. Edith knew what was under his sleeves already although she didn't know exactly what was under the rest of his clothes.

Just like that night at the office he was still wearing his waistcoat. Men had so many layers of clothing. There were plenty of clothes left for her to take off before she would see any more of his body. Edith herself was only wearing a thin, armless dress over her underwear.

So much had happened between them since that night in the office. The floating physical attraction she had felt then had developed into the deepest love she had ever felt for a man.

They had so many memories to share. Even the way he had broken up with her had turned into a precious memory, now that they were back together again. He had been so tender, even then, she had been so aware of what she was losing. She had never hated him for doing it, she had only been afraid to accept him back and have her heart broken again.

She wasn't afraid of losing him now. She knew how much he loved her. So what was she afraid of?

She had thought it all through so many times. She had slept with Michael before marrige - or, as it turned out - instead of marriage. She didn't want Bertie to think he was any less valuable to her than Michael had been. She didn't want him to think that now, and she didn't want him to think that in five years time.

Maybe that was the problem. She wanted to make love to Bertie tonight because it was the right thing to do, not because she was full of desire. Not like she had been half an hour ago, when they had danced like that, like one being, oblivous of the world around them. Only concious of their own and each other's bodies.

Then she had felt that she couldn't wait to get home and be alone with him. In bed. But now it had all evaporated somehow.

He was here, he looked at her with those puppy dog eyes. She loved him, she didn't know what held her back. She was sure he wondered what she was really up to.

Perhaps she should kiss him? She always wanted to do that when he looked at her like that.

"Do you want some tea or a nightcap?" she asked instead. "Or coffee, perhaps?"

...

A little while later they were sitting together on the sofa with their glasses in front of them at the table. They had each taken a small sip, and now they were reclining on the sofa, Edith leaning against Bertie's chest.

"Please take off your waistcoat", she said to him. "The buttons hurt." She felt a little uncomfortable leaning against them, but she was exaggerating when she said that they hurt. She only wanted to get some more of his clothes off.

He obliged, of course, and after that they cuddled up together again, both of them too comfortable to speak.

...

Nothing more happened for a long long time. Edith didn't know how to begin this, and Bertie thought that he had either misunderstood her or else she had changed her mind.

Which was both fine with him. Soon enough they would be married and together like that anyhow.

So he started talking about his train-journey and some new investments he needed to make for Brancaster.

After sitting there like that for an hour or so, Bertie speaking about everyday things, Edith hardly speaking at all, Bertie told Edith that perhaps he ought to leave.

Edith felt that the opportunity was slipping through her fingers. They were sitting beside each other on the sofa again now and Bertie had started to put on his waistcoat. She didn't like that at all, this was all moving in the wrong direction.

She just couldn't let him leave. In her desperation to keep him there she slid out of the upper part of her dress and let it hang down by her waist.

Bertie saw through the corner of his eye that she was doing something, so he stopped buttoning up his waistcoat and threw a glance in her direction. His chin almost fell to the floor when he saw her there wearing only the very thin silk lace brassiere.

"You...", he stuttered. "Edith... you..."

He shook his head in disbelief.

"You are so beautiful", he said then.

That encouraged her to take one of his hands in hers and place it on her naked breast, inside of the brassiere. She felt her nipple hardening against his hand, although he was holding it absolutely still there.

She quickly took his hand out again, got up from the sofa, dragged him up after her and started to lead him by his hand towards the bedroom. He just went along with her, his hand in hers, without uttering a single word.

She looked up at him and his face was totally serious, almost solemn, as he returned her look.

Something new was happening, something of great significance, something that was going to change their relationship for ever.

He was probably scared of that. Scared and happy.

So was she.

...

Once they got into the bedroom and sat down on the bed, Edith started to feel shy again. What was she doing, she wondered.

Bertie, who could see her hesitation, wondered once more if she had changed her mind. He still had the memory of her soft breast with the hard nipple inside his hand. She must have meant something by doing that, but perhaps she regretted it now.

"Do you really want this?" he asked softly.

Edith looked up at him again. This time he was smiling and his eyes were full of tenderness.

She nodded, at first not able to get any words out. He wanted this, she was suddenly sure of it.

"Yes", she whispered. "I want you. I want this to happen now."

Bertie nodded, still smiling at her.

"It's upon time", she added. "I have felt that I'm yours for so long now."

So he kissed her.

* * *

AN: Thank you for reading! Thank you for the reviews to the first chapter!

Please let me know what you think!


	3. Gasping and Panting, Sighing and Moaning

Edith felt her desires rise again while they kissed. It was very reluctantly that she allowed Bertie to break the kiss.

Bertie looked at Edith. She looked so serious, he wanted to make her smile. This was supposed to be fun, after all. So he tried to sound as formal as possible when he spoke next.

"I would consider it a great honour if you would allow me to remove your brassiere, Lady Edith", he said, trying to keep a straight face.

"Yes", Edith said, smiling at him, too eager to be able to laugh at his formal manners. "I would greatly appreciate if you would take the trouble of doing that, Lord Hexham."

He laughed at that. He loved her. And he hoped he had managed to make her less nervous about what was about to happen. At least he felt less nervous himself.

"That was meant as an indecent proposal", he added gently, repeating her words from the evening when she had sent him to bed happy. "Though I might get even more indecent later on, I'm afraid. You'd better be prepared for that."

"Yes", she said again, almost breathlessly this time. "I'd like that!"

So he bent down over her, putting his hands on the back of the brassiere where he had seen that it was held together when he followed her into the bedroom. He struggled a bit with the clasp, but then he managed to get it open. He brought his hands forward, one side of the bra in each of them, letting her breasts fall out as he endeavoured to get her arms out of the straps.

Then he took a long look at her again, marvelling at what he was about to receive.

...

Edith felt Bertie's eyes upon her, wondering if he was disappointed with the way she looked. She had given birth to a child, she had breastfed her baby. Her breasts didn't look at all the same as when she was twenty, not even like they had looked that one time so many years ago when she had slept with Michael Gregson. Not that she had worried very much about how she looked then - that time she had worried a lot more about how much it would hurt.

She was glad she didn't have to worry about that now - not for the next nine months at least, she reminded herself.

Instead Edith was worried about the way she looked. She wanted to give Bertie the best - she wanted him to be happy with her. And that long silent look made her fear that he wasn't.

To hide her embarrassment Edith started to unbutton Bertie's shirt. But she needn't have worried.

"You are so beautiful", Bertie said, shaking his head in disbelief. "So incredibly beautiful. No wonder I'm mad about you."

Then he put one hand on each of her breasts, moving his thumbs softly over her nipples, making her forget everything she had ever worried about in life. It was only him and her again - their bodies and their souls, but mostly their bodies - just like when they had danced together earlier that night. She pressed herself against his hands as their lips met again for a new deep kiss.

...

Then things started to happen more quickly. Bertie's shirt and Edith's dress were swiftly removed and put on a chair beside the bed.

After that Bertie hesitated for a moment with his hands on his belt. Should he remove his trousers? But Edith whispered: "Take them off", so he quickly did as he was told, although he had some difficulties getting them off because of his arousal.

So, when they lay down on the bed, they were wearing nothing but knickers and underpants. That was alright to begin with as they rolled around in bed kissing and fondling and licking each other, getting more and more heated.

After a while even those scant articles of clothing seemed to be covering too much of their bodies. Bertie tentatively put one of his hands inside Edith's knickers, not only once but twice. The first time he only caressed her female parts and the soft silk-like hair upon it. The second time he started exploring her folds, finding the wet opening, and almost putting one of his fingers into it. Well - almost is perhaps the wrong word - but he didn't put much of it in, less than an inch or so, making Edith moan with pleasure. **  
**

She was so wet. He was planning to put his hand in her knickers a third time, to rub that little knob of hers, but before he had time to do that he felt that Edith had got _her_ hand inside _his_ underpants. She was holding and rubbing him in a way that almost made him lose himself.

"Careful there", he said softly. "Or I can't promise I will be able to finish this in a dignified manner."

"Oh!" Edith said. "Sorry!"

"Perhaps we should take these last things off also", Bertie said when she let go of him. And so they did.

...

After some more kissing and caressing - including a very thorough rubbing by his hand of her knob, making her squeal with satisfaction - Bertie was finally on top of Edith, ready to enter.

He felt his tenderness for her through his desire. He was barely able to control himself now, but there was something he had to say to her before he went ahead. Something he must have said earlier tonight, during all they had done this enchanted evening, though he couldn't at all remember saying it.

Well, it had to be said. He couldn't make love to her this very first time without saying it.

So he broke their kiss, held himself up on his elbows, took her head between his hands and looked into her eyes that were full of love and expectation.

"I love you Edith", he said, trying to get all the passion and tenderness he felt for her into his voice. "I love you so much."

Then he very slowly pressed on until he was inside her.

"I love you too", Edith gasped as she felt him moving into her.

 **...**

After that nothing more was said for a while.

The only sounds that could be heard in the room was their gasping and panting, sighing and moaning, interspersed with the very ancient sound of a man moving in and out of a woman on a steady trot while she was rocking with him, pressing herself against him as closely as she could possibly get.

"Oh, Bertie", Edith sighed when they were finished. She was exhausted now. Exhausted, satisfied, happy.

"That was wonderful", Bertie answered breathlessly. "Simply wonderful."

...

Ten minutes later they were lying in bed, exactly the way Edith had anticipated. They were both naked under the thick duvet. They were lying at their sides, Edith's back against Bertie's chest. He was holding his arm protectively around her.

It was so warm and comfortable, even better than Edith had thought it would be.

She had asked him to stay the night, and he had promised to do so. She had told him she didn't want to wake up without him in the morning.

Edith was nearly falling asleep, but Bertie was starting to have second thoughts.

He hadn't planned this, not at all, he had just got carried away by the moment and her eagerness and the way they had danced together and the thought that he wasn't going to see her again for more than a whole week.

"Oh, Edith", he said with a sigh. "This wasn't supposed to happen. I wasn't going to make love to you before we were married. I wanted to prove to you that I was able to wait."

"But you weren't able to wait, were you?" Edith said with a sleepy, mischievous smile.

"No." Bertie shook his head. "No, I wasn't. I was totally unable to wait."

"And you enjoyed it!" Edith said, all insecurity gone now that she had made him her lover.

"Yes, of course I did", he said. "It was wonderful. But that is not the point."

"What _is_ the point then?" Edith asked. Why couldn't he just be happy? She was.

"The point is that I really wanted to prove to you that I could wait. I wanted to prove to you that I was a better man than Mr. Gregson."

Edith rolled around to face Bertie. She gave him a big, satisfied smile.

"Don't worry about that, my darling", she said tenderly. "You did."

Then she turned her back to him, cuddling into his embrace again, leaving him to wonder what she had meant.

But somehow it made him stop worrying about Mr. Gregson.

* * *

AN: Thank you for reading! Thank you for the very kind reviews to last chapter!

Please leave a comment!

...

Just a short epilogue left.

...

I actually think that the way Bertie and Edith smile at each other in church is meant to show that their courtship hasn't been all that innocent. And Laura C called it something like _the most modern romance_ in DA, so why not?


	4. Coming Back Home - a Kind of Epilogue

So, he had wanted to wait, Edith thought. He must have wanted to wait to show her how much he loved and respected her and that he didn't expect anything from her because of what Mary had called 'her past'.

He was pretty adorable, wasn't he.

Edith herself had wanted to go ahead because she wanted to show _him_ how much she loved him and that she wanted to give him anything that she had ever given Michael. And more.

Now, half asleep in his arms, she was happy that she was the one who had had her way in this. Because it had been wonderful, and it was still wonderful now.

...

Edith and Bertie both slept very well that night, cuddled together under the duvet.

The next morning they made love again, both feeling a bit more relaxed than the first time. Bertie was happy now that they had already done it so he had no reason to hold himself back any longer.

Bertie missed the morning train. Then he missed the nine o'clock. After that he missed the eleven o'clock.

Edith missed six hours of work on the magazine so she decided to stay in London another day to make up for it. She had wanted to see him off to the train also, so it had taken some extra time following him there and kissing him thoroughly on the platform, but it had been totally worth it.

It was all totally worth it.

...

Bertie's mother Patricia greeted him when he arrived home very late that evening.

"Did you have a good time in London?" she asked. Though she knew the answer to that one, her son was beaming with joy.

"Yes", he said quickly, having an awkward feeling that he was blushing. "Edith sends you her love."

"Please send her my love next time you call her", Patricia said. Then she took a long scrutinizing look at her son, feeling rather certain of what he and Edith had done in London.

...

Bertie making Brancaster into a moral centre, his mother thought with a chuckle. Whatever had given her that strange idea?

She realised how ridiculous it had been. Bertie, who couldn't ever keep his eyes or his hands off Edith for longer than five minutes. Bertie, who had even asked Edith to kiss him in front of his own mother and Edith's parents. She had wondered then if they were perhaps already lovers.

Patricia had quickly given up the idea of a moral centre after that. Perhaps it had been a stupid idea anyhow, not at all in accordance with the spirits of the time.

No, she decided never to meddle into Bertie and Edith's business again. To let them do what they wanted, with their relationship, with Brancaster and with everything else. She was certain they were capable of taking care of both themselves and each other and the estate.

...

Patricia didn't much doubt what Bertie and Edith had been up to in London this time. There was a marked difference in Bertie's looks and manners that could only be explained by him having been to bed with Edith. Probably for the first time.

Unlike what Bertie might have thought, his mother didn't resent that at all. She was very happy for him.

Patricia had disliked that Edith had slept with another man. Bertie's mother loved the little girl that had resulted from that union, she was happy that the girl would come and live with them at Brancaster, but she still resented the fact that Edith had had an affair with Marigold's father. Though she wouldn't dream to say a word about that, not any more.

But what Edith did with Bertie was an entirely different matter. Edith making Bertie happy could never be wrong, no matter how she brought it about. Besides, they were going to be married in two weeks time, so any result of their encounter this time could easily be explained by normal variation.

...

Edith was the love of Bertie's life, and his mother knew that. She was rather certain that Bertie was the love of Edith's life also. Edith was beaming when she looked at Patricia's son, and that warmed his mother's heart.

Patricia knew fuller well that if Bertie had to chose between Edith and herself he would always chose Edith. But that didn't matter. She and Edith were getting along splendidly by now, and she had every intention of keeping it that way.

Patricia wanted what was best for Bertie, and Edith was so obviously what was best for him. Edith made Bertie stronger and happier.

Patricia only regretted that she hadn't understood that at once. That Edith helped Bertie to become a better man.

* * *

AN: This is the end of my first and probably last M-rated story.

...

Thank you for reading! Thank you for all the lovely comments!

Please let me know what you think!

...

I have enjoyed writing this story very much. Much more than I probably ought to, to quote Sir Anthony.


	5. Christmas at Downton - the Real Epilogue

When Edith and Bertie woke up the next morning, Edith still in her London flat, Bertie in his room in Brancaster, they were both thinking about the same thing - how would they be able to make love during Christmas at Downton.

...

Edith was thinking through the layout of the second floor at Downton.

If she could get Bertie into the closest room in the bachelor wing, and then Mrs. Pelham in the very nice guestroom further away and around the corner from Edith's room, then perhaps she could persuade him to come to her room at night. Or the other way around.

They were not having any other guests over Christmas so it was probably doable. She would tell her mother that she wanted them placed like that because she thought that the rooms were the nicest ones.

Hopefully her mother wouldn't understand the real reason.

...

Two days earlier Bertie had been quite willing to wait until their wedding night, now he felt that it would be difficult even to wait the seven days that were left till Christmas. He really wanted her now - or at least very soon.

He was a little surprised by his own reaction - only two weeks he told himself - but two weeks felt much longer than they had done two days ago.

The apetite grows with eating, or so they say. Now he knew more precicely what it was he was abstaining from, and that made it harder.

He sincerely hoped that Edith was feeling the same.

* * *

AN: Thank you for reading! Thank you for the lovely comments to last chapter!

...

I have almost ten unfinished stories so of course I felt that I needed to write an extra chapter to one of my complete ones!

...

Mrs. Pelham's words to Edith in the staircase after the wedding is what made me write last chapter - the really important thing for her is that Edith loves Bertie.

I was rather annoyed at her for what she said to Bertie in the library, but it seemed that she came to her sences after that.


End file.
